I Just Want You
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This is a solo performance that takes place near a classroom in the Illustration Department at RISD.
The performance setup includes a table and chair, a piece of discarded wood collected from the wood shop, inked black and carved with the phrase “I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY.” Wood shavings from the carving process remain on the table. Other objects include a black marker, a bottle of the performer’s favorite perfume, and a deliberately exaggerated outfit.
During the performance, the performer slowly covers the carved letters with a marker, speaks quietly to themself, removes layers of clothing, and applies perfume to different parts of the body. The audience is allowed to observe closely, but there is no verbal or physical interaction between the performer and the viewers.
The project is driven by two main lines of thought.
First, after reading Sara Ahmed’s essay “Happy Objects”, I began to notice how certain ideas of “happiness” are socially pre-labeled and imposed. From a young age, we are taught that harmony equals happiness, that stepping back in conflict is a virtue, and that pleasing others is a good thing. Over time, I realized that I had internalized this logic and often became a “pleaser.” While this can make others feel comfortable, it can also lead to self-doubt, internal exhaustion, and the sacrifice of one’s own needs and decisions.
Second, the performance focuses on the transitional moment right before leaving home. This moment sits between private and public space, between freedom and self-regulation. Common actions during this time—choosing an outfit, styling hair, putting on makeup, wearing accessories—are often done for both comfort and social presentation. However, once outside, these elements mostly function to be seen by others. Perfume operates differently. Scent is subjective, personal, and constantly experienced by the wearer rather than reflected back through a mirror. In this sense, perfume becomes an act of pleasing oneself rather than others, and serves as a key symbol of self-attunement in this performance.
Within this context, the phrase “I just want you to be happy” is treated as a gentle but persistent form of discipline.
Ultimately, the performance aims to create a visible inner shift—from pleasing others to caring for oneself. It invites the audience to consider where the line is between caring for others and pleasing them, and whether such acts have led to positive or harmful outcomes. At the same time, the work does not demand a fixed interpretation, and can also be received simply as an open emotional state.